“Are you sure?”

If a survivor has mustered up the courage to tell you about childhood abuse, your job is to offer spiritual support. Any comment that indicates doubt (“That’s hard to believe”) or uncertainty (“Maybe you’re not remembering correctly?”) is not supportive. Also, it’s not appropriate to pry or to ask for more details.

Some helpful initial responses include the following:

• “I’m so sorry that happened to you.”  
• “It was never your fault.” 
• “You didn’t deserve that.” 
• “How can I best support you?”  
• “I’m ready to listen whenever you want to tell me more.”

Of course you probably have questions, and there may be situations down the road where further clarification is needed. But be gentle and patient. Let your questions stay between you and the good Lord when you pray. Above all, seek to act in love and in wisdom.

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash.com.